Sunday, December 09, 2012
Where to start?
I seem to have lost my camera. I write much better when I start with a picture. This white screen looking back at me right now is.....scary.
School is done for the semester and I feel AMAZING. What a wild ride it was. Lots of highs and certainly plenty of lows. For the past 2 weeks or so I had my nose to the grind and was dedicating every minute to my school work. There's no such thing as balance in my books!
So need less to say, I'm happily in love with my husband again. It's amazing how I can truly enjoy my time with him when I don't have a thesis bubble following me around EVERYWHERE. I'm giving myself a 3 week break!
Seriously I'd wake up in cold sweats for the last week or so because I didn't have a direction for my final paper. I buried myself in the literature. All I could think about was my topic. I devoured any book/ article that I could find and I'm pretty proud to say that I am starting to enjoy reading, albeit I'll always LOVE writing more.
AND I found an editor to proof read my stuff, which I'll pay in coffee/ lunch dates.
During my studies one night I went blind. For 30 minutes, all I could see was a bright light, like a bar code, that dashed across my vision. It was scary. I cried and panicked and thought I'd lose my vision, because even when I closed my eyes I could still see the light. It was better the next day with some rest. I suspect my eyes were strained from looking at the computer screen for 10+ hours a day.
Okay what else....
I got a job as an RA (research assistant) then the next day I lost the job because the professor "changed her mind" and decided she didn't want an RA. So that screwed me out of the job I turned down (because I accepted the RA position). So no work next semester. What shall I do with all my time?
HA! I'll find a way to fill it....I'm not worried about that.
I miss writing. I've connected with some real cool people in real life and had many good conversations with these people.
I'm finding my way in the mess that is grad school. I'm growing more than I ever expected and pushing myself past limits that I didn't even know existed.
It's lovely and complicated all rolled up into one -- quite transformational and I LOVE IT!